Now I simply cannot cover everybody, so if you get left out, don't feel bad, I still love you.
Here goes...
Name: Paul
Known Aliases: N.F.P. (Not Fun Paul), Peesh, and most recently: Zongo
I met Paul freshman year when we were both running XC at Cortland and we've been friends ever since. I've lived with Paul for the last two years, last year in Shit House, and now this year in Shit Apartment. (There will be a profile of both of those places soon). Paul quit running for the team sophomore year, and decided that he wanted to get big. So he started lifting weights like a damn animal. He did develop some real nice man breasts. That was fine, except that now he has decided to be a runner again, and his breasts are weighing him down.
Paul has earned the nickname N.F.P. over the last year, after he ceased to be fun. Maybe it's him becoming mature at a faster rate than the rest of us idiots, or maybe he's just a pussy. He used to get wild and do fun things like yell at crackhead townies, smear cake into the carpet, throw his phone down the street like Chad Pennington throws footballs.
Paul also may or may not be a serial killer, he disappears for long periods of time, makes up excuses to leave the apartment, like going to buy alfredo sauce at 11:30 at night. We're convinced he murders people like Patrick Bateman.
In spite of the probable homicides, and the lack of fun, he's still a blast to be around, and he has made my time here at Cortland bearable. Good job Zongo!
